Papercuts...Familiar things

    I started to feel slightly buzzed when I returned from the mail room. The smell in the office smacked me in the face when I opened the door. It was the smell of Oldie. She has a unique and intoxicating scent about her. I could picture her getting ready for work each morning. She must place a smidge of Aspercream on her back, a smear of Icy Hot on her ankles, and a swipe of Ben Gay on each knee. The scent had become familiar to me. I sat down at my desk and looked over at Oldie. She was turned away from her computer monitor and staring out of the window behind her desk. I knew what ritual was about to happen. She slowly and methodically reached over to her desk and popped the top on her little can of Joint Juice. She slowly reached for a small bourbon glass filled with ice and carefully poured the Joint Juice over the ice. She looked like she was deliberately acting in a commercial with slow motion. The glucosomine concoction bubbled and fizzed over the ice. Oldie threw the small can into the trash can and swiveled back around to look out of the window. During this ritual she was oblivious to my gaping at her. A glazed look came over her eyes and I could tell that she was somewhere else in her mind. She took tiny sips of the drink and savored each second in her state. I wonder what she thought about each day as she sipped the unpalatable drink. In my own glassy- eyed daydream, I would imagine HER dreams of being a firm, tanned, bikini clad, 23 year old sitting by a pool in some warm, exotic location. Her scent would be of coconut suntan lotion, pineapples, and maraschino cherries. She would have long, wavy, shiny, rich chestnut hair that cascaded over her majestically perfect breasts. Periodically she would flip her hair over her shoulder and let it hang down her back as she tanned. She would be unapproachable to most. Perhaps some brave, dashing, muscular, young, tanned man would offer to buy her a drink from the poolside bar. She would lower her sunglasses down her nose, squint her eyes, take him up on his offer, lift her sunglasses back to cover her eyes, and wait for him to return. He would return with a pale orange fruity drink filled with fruit and proceed to chat her up. She would drink the drink seductively, but he surely would not get her telephone number. She would have that power. She is the queen of any pool.
     Around 1:15 each day, I would be ripped from my staring at Oldie and she from her hunk by the pool by Cherry's chatter as she returned from lunch with Smarty. Cherry talks A LOT. One morning I heard her talking to people all the way from a block away until she got into the office, through the entire day, and out the door at the end of the day. It's annoying, yet amazing. By the end of each day, she is hoarse from talking so much. After a telephone call, she will tell Smarty what was said...word for word. After she receives an email, she will read the email to Smarty, a discussion will ensue, and a response will be deliberated...all vocally. In telling Smarty everything, Oldie and I are forced to hear it all too. Cherry even talks to herself. By 3 o'clock each day, I am in sensory overload. Just when it looks like we will get a few minutes of sweet silence, someone calls or emails Cherry and she starts at it again. I often go to the bathroom just to hear nothing. It's just too much.
   Cherry sat down at her desk and started to talk out loud about what WE need to accomplish for the remainder of the day. You see, there have to be forms and reports generated to tell us if we are doing the right things with the forms and paper we push. These forms and reports are generated on a weekly schedule. The MSR (Money Spent Report) tells how much money was spent for the total week. The ROP (Report On Prices) tells how much the supplies purchased can be bought for. The FRL (Forms Received Late) tells what forms were received late. The FROT (Forms Received On Time) tells what forms were received on time. The SWN (Supplies We Need) tells the supplies needed. The PEQ (Paper Extraction Query) tells what forms and reports should be printed each week. The APM (All Paper Managed) tells what forms and reports were generated throughout the week. The MOR (Mismanagement of Resources) tells what resources were not used to their fullest potential. Lastly, the SOR (Statement of Results) ties it all together in some way. We print off all of these reports and forms. Cherry pretends to study them all the while talking. We make photocopies of them all, file a copy of each, mail out a copy of each to corporate headquarters, and shred the ones that were generated from last weeks batch of the same forms. Week after week, year after year.

Decisions

   In my last blog I was discussing my frustrations over my lack of ability to "life multi-task". This morning I made a decision. I cannot focus on more than one thing at a time and do anything well. In order for me to get to work, on time, every day, I have to let everything else go. This week I will be working 46 hours. Next week I will be working 43 hours. The week after that I will be working 52 hours. I know my limits. I will not be able to work a full work week, bowl, go to the gym, do housework, and go to tax class. Therefore, I'm just going to give up everything but the working. Unfortunately, at this time, I HAVE to work. I haven't been able to get another job with the hours I desire. The choice is to either screw up at this job and do extra curricular activities OR drop everything else and do the job correctly. I'm just going to go to work on time, cook dinners each night, and go to bed to get to work the next morning. I don't see this changing anytime soon. So, that's my life.